I would like to start this by providing you with some background information about me; I was raised in a southern small town that was primarily conservative and almost exclusively Southern Baptist. Yes, hatred surrounded my everywhere I went. Somehow I managed to not become the monster I could have, and emerged a freethinking human being that doesn't strictly define himself with any title. I also don't Identify with any religion.
My family, though I love them and they love me, does not often agree with, well, anything I believe. You see, I don't hate Obama, so I'm a Liberal Marxist Muslim Atheist Communist Terrorist, and all of my ideas exist solely to cripple the foundation of the holy USA. The reaction my ideas elicit from those who surround me is comparable to the reaction you'd get from speaking of eating vomit and spitting on children elsewhere. For this reason, I don't often discuss my ideas with them and they return the favor. Luckily most people in my family are beautiful human beings who can focus on what we have in common and ignore what disgusts us.
So, to the idea at the heart of this; Who are the true job creators in the United States? Whoever they are, they need to step their game up. I have frivolous spending to do and need more income to support this mindless action! I mean, Jesus, I can't wear anything but Gucci or my skin breaks out in a horrible poor-people rash and I start smelling like old dog food cans.
A lot of people believe rich businessmen create jobs. I mean, you typically work for a business, right? So people who create businesses must create jobs. Eureka! I've got it, I'll start a business selling my old socks. It will make me rich and, because it's a business, it will create numerous jobs for those dirty common folk that think I care about them.
Oh, damn, I forgot; There isn't a market for my dirty socks. If no one buys them, my business will close, and I'll be left poor and no jobs will be created. Wait a minute, that means that creating and running a business doesn't necessarily mean you create jobs. That must mean that jobs are truly created by ordinary people spending money.
Yes, that's it. Do you buy things? If so, thank you. You are supporting the American economy. Well, kind of. You see, most companies now outsource labor or buy parts from other countries. Why? Cheap labor, of course. But, truthfully, that isn't the only reason. There are quite a few other countries, such as Japan and Germany, that have a workforce more skilled than our own. Our college tuition costs are abhorrent. There are many people perfectly capable of becoming experts in useful fields that simply can not afford the costs associated with doing so. They do have the option of going thousands of dollars in debt for a shot at the golden ticket, but it's truly not that enticing an avenue.
Actually, they're just filthy, lazy, pity-party throwing, procrastinating, smelly poor people who don't even deserve the oxygen we allow them.
Or maybe we should make education a little cheaper, I don't know. It's easier to just say that I'm better than them and laugh at their attempts at comfortable living. It's so great to see them fail, it's like crack.
Consumers, the ever-dwindling middle class, are the real job creators. Most rich businessmen create only more wealth for themselves, and they don't spend the vast majority of it. If they do, it's probably into starting more businesses that outsource labor. Or they buy foreign stocks. Or they just make chairs and toilets out of 100 dollar bills.
If we want to fix our economy, we've got to have jobs that provide enough disposable income for us to purchase products and services that companies provide. We also have to build a workforce skilled enough to woo our companies back home. And, for that reason, I support Obama in his collaboration with ISIS and Satan to come up with the idea of providing 2 years of community college free to American citizens.
I dream of an America where I never have to have that poor-people rash again.
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