It’s hard to watch the media these days and not see Donald Trump’s massive orange head plastered all over it. Trump’s speeches are headline news. The man doesn’t pass on an opportunity to stick his foot in his mouth or talk out his ass. He oozes contempt - a hideous caricature of greedy businessmen, a self-aggrandizing megalomaniac - one straight out of an Oliver Stone flick.
And yet it’s this man who, by all accounts, sits high atop the Republican Presidential polls. A man who has never held public office and is most widely known as the ‘star’ of his own reality show.
After years of ridicule everyone has finally started taking Trump seriously, which says more about the other nominee’s disastrous campaign management more than anything - Bush 2.5’s campaign has, for example, resorted to ‘Late Night’ talk show raffles to draw finance money despite the fact Bush’s Super PAC reported over $120 million in campaign fundraisers.
Trump Mania has become too big a problem for the GOP to ignore any longer.
Hell-bent on disarming the Trump frenzy, and thus continuing the status quo, Republican National Committee Chairman Reince Priebus asked all candidates this past week to sign a pledge where in they’d forgo running as an independent candidate and shift all support to the actual nominee given they lose out fair and square. Donald Trump was the only candidate who refused to promise not to run as an Independent in the first Republican debate. It goes to show just how petulant our swinish ‘representatives’ are. ‘Not fair! I play by the rules! Why does he get to say whatever he wants? How come he has no one to answer to?’
Trump’s candid remarks come with the polls to back him. That support has the man ready to say anything and everything to assure himself of a presidential nomination. How shocking to hear a Republican call out the bankers of America and the low tax rates they command or more recently chiding Kentucky county clerk Kim Davis for refusing to issue a marriage license to a same-sex couple.
The prominent multi-billionaire running for office is nothing new. Hell, most of the bastards even enjoyed a modicum of success. Ross Perot managed nearly 20% of the vote in 1992, just enough to fuck over good ole Bush Sr. After stints as governors of their respective states George Romney and Nelson Rockefeller threw their hats into the Republican candidacy cluster-fuck of 1968. Let’s not forget three terms as mayor of New York City wasn’t quite enough for Michael Bloomberg. $30 billion was enough to extend that term limit. But when you’ve got $30 billion you deserve as many terms as money can buy.
But Trump is the wild card. The outsider’s outsider. A man so far detached from reality he’s just too goddamn stubborn to put his own sad excuse of a comb-over out of its miserable existence.
Yup. We are good and fucked, so why not cease total control to the true royalty of this country - the power hungry minions of Trump’s ilk. Time to quit pretending who really runs our government. Give these elitist pigs the chance to fuck it up without avoiding the blame as they stand hidden behind the money curtain.
Do we really need another Clinton or Bush in the White House? The two presidents who reduced the most powerful position in the world to a laughing stock of sexual mockery and ape like levels of intelligence.
It’s too late on the Democrat side. Even with enthusiastic youth behind him, Bernie Sanders poses no real threat. Hillary’s ticket is booked. Regardless of what vile treachery lurks at the depths of her personal emails another Clinton will appear on the presidential ballot next year. The same can’t quite be said about Jeb Bush, but most still consider him the GOP favorite.
Poor Jeb. The faint imaginations of your idiot brother were just fading in people’s minds. Eight years is a long time to wait for your shot in the spotlight. And now, to possibly have it snatched away by this self-absorbed cartoon character, must really suck.
Another Bush? Another Clinton? Another any of them? All cut from the same cloth, greased by the same corporate overlords, codified by the same social elite, and voted on by the same clueless electorate all because we are too goddamn afraid to admit the whole thing is a sham that hasn’t worked properly since the Eisenhower era. Better to fool ourselves and keep preaching sweet nothings. No. No more.
No more refurbished amalgamations of past participants. You don’t save the world by rebranding shit. That’s why it’s time to give an entirely new breed of menacing slime the chance to fuck it all up. That’s why we need a leader both parties can hate and refuse to work with. The forced camaraderie just may salvage everyone from our “do nothing” times.
We need Donald Trump.
It’s time to ride full-steam ahead with the lunacy. No more countless idling. Let’s jam our full weight on that accelerator of craziness and drive top-speed over the cliff, burst into a flaming orange rocket, and careen off with no end in sight. It’s the only
true American way.
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